Carolyn Lykkemark,
aka “Amna of Sarah”
The Heart of a Songbird
By Carolyn Lykkemark
The Fear
The Freeze
The Unearthing
The Love
The Journey
“Creative work is more accurately a machine that digs down and finds stuff, emotional stuff that will someday be raw material that can be used to produce more stuff, stuff like itself – clay to be available for future use.”
David Byrne
~ author of Bicycle Diaries ~
The Fear
Easily sang, the baby songbird.
Born to sing was she!
All who listened were easily stirred.
Hearts took wing, flew free!
A vibrant-coloured bird she was!
Orange and Purple and Blue!
Free and wild, yet gentle because
Her heart was pure and true.
Now, nestled inside the baby songbird
A voice within there be!
In quiet, she listened and oh, her heart stirred
While perched up in the tree.
The message of that voice within
Was clearly to be shared.
It spoke of truth and love. No sin.
No reason to be scared.
With that knowing, she sang out
One stormy, blustery day.
“Have no fear!”, she did spout.
As her branch did sway.
Suddenly, lightening struck the roots
Of the songbird’s tree.
Her heart was shocked. Her voice went mute.
Fell to the ground, did she.
The rain poured down; thunder rolled.
Wet leaves buried her deep.
The night rolled in and as foretold:
For years, she fell asleep.
"My childhood had gone by without my knowing,
and it seemed as if my heart had frozen."
Ishmael Beah
~ author of A Long Way Gone ~
The Freeze
Years flew by. The songbird grew.
Still buried deep in sleep.
She dreamt of love that’s meant for two
Special, true and sweet.
One fateful day, a cold, dark squall
Disguised as a Chinook
Thrust her awake and had the gall
To blame her for her look!
The songbird managed to escape
Although her wings, he broke.
She told no one about that day
Instead, her heart, she froze.
From time to time her heart was raw
So, snowflakes she consumed.
The brain freeze helped her to withdraw
From feelings best entombed.
Her lyrical birdsong still rang true
But her inner voice was mute.
She followed advice from those who “knew”.
She blindly flew their route.
A Master of Music she did pursue.
A Vocal Performance degree
Classical singing and opera too
But void of joy was she.
For she loved pop and Broadway tunes!
Hair and Carole King!
Songs like 99 Red Balloons
Made her heart take wing.
"Unearthing the truth was akin to creating it;
something new and profound appeared where it hadn’t been before.”
Patti Callahan Henry
~ author of The Art of Keeping Secrets ~
The Unearthing
The songbird’s heart was oh so sad
That one day it just broke.
She cried and cried; feared she be mad.
But then, the voice, it spoke!
“You’re hiding out. You must take flight.
Opera isn’t you.
Listen to me. You’ll be alright.
It’s time to go now. Shoo!”
Trusting her inner voice’s quest
She quit her Master’s degree.
She flew out East and built a nest,
Yet her heart still wasn’t free.
Her past weighed heavily on her heart
Pot and alcohol too.
So, she bravely tore her life apart
To create her life anew.
Sobriety and therapy intertwined
Unearthed her painful roots
And A Course In Miracles blew her mind
With its undeniable truths.
The voice within she aimed to hone.
As her emotions and feelings flailed.
A rocky road to freedom it was
But, peace of mind prevailed.
With newfound hope and coping tools
Her heart felt safe to sing
No longer confined by Classical rules
Her heartsong, it took wing!
“Travel far enough, you meet yourself.”
David Mitchell
~ author of Cloud Atlas ~
The Love
The songbird flew from branch to branch
Singing pop and Broadway tunes
She even sang in a rock n’ roll band
And wrote some originals too.
She met her soulmate, birthed a son,
Voice lessons, began to teach.
She wrote a song called “We Are One”
Which one day she’ll release.
She produced and performed musical shows
That centered on many things:
Love from another, a problem, could pose.
But love from within? Your heart sings!
Emotions and feelings lead the way.
Notice the thoughts you think.
Fearful thoughts lead you astray.
Be aware of judgements you sling.
Now take those thoughts and judgements too
And toss them to the wind.
Then feel your heart become anew
As awareness of love swoops in.
This awareness of love, the songbird hones.
A lifetime work it is.
In a world of contrast and sticks and stones
No greater work than this.
The flight path isn’t always smooth.
Full of ups and downs!
The voice within is there to soothe
The raucous jarring sounds.
“The true story of every person in this world is not the story you see,
the external story.
The true story of each person is the journey of his or her heart.”
John Eldredge
~ author of Wild at Heart ~
The Journey
The songbird’s journey is the deepest yet:
The rape 40 years ago.
That cold, dark squall that became a threat
Kept a piece of her heart froze.
In 2019, she came to know
That PTSD, she had.
The songbird wanted her heart to flow
So back to therapy she fled
Through Tapping Assisted Psychotherapy
Her story of rape, she told.
The telling helped her heart unfreeze
And again, the voice, it spoke!
“Take your song, We Are One
And your rape story of old.
Create a show unlike any you’ve done.
It’s time to break the mould.”
And with that clarion call of rebirth,
The songbird’s third eye opened
And a mammoth energy was unearthed!
A raging love in motion!
The songbird’s intuition roared,
“A creative artist, you are!
You’re not just a singer, you’re so much more!
Embrace the avant-garde!
Summon in this new era!
From within, be birthed!
She shall be named, ‘Amna of Sarah’.
It’s who you are, unearthed!”
For the moment, the songbird is perched.
Working diligently.
Creating a show that’s full of firsts.
Stay tuned. Much love! Peace.
